Say something about gay babies.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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