Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
