i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Randomize
