i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
