her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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