Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
