Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
