i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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