She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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