Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize