Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Randomize