Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize