ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
