Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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