I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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