It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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