my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
