If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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