Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
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