hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
