his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
