miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Randomize
