It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize
