Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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