oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
