I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize