did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
