Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
