she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
