so that wasnt chicken after all
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
