Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
