she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
