I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Boobs are out for the taking
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
