Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
In America we eat man semen.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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