hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize