also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
