You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
