called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
