yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
you have to choose: penises or morals?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
