remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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