he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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