i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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