yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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