Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
