I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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