i think my tv is drunk
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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