But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
