I'm drive I can fine osifer
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
