Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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