She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Sext me about skeletons
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
