he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
