You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
why do cheetos always look like penises
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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