Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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