Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
